Start the New Year right by reflecting on some of these with a bottle of bourbon at home instead of going to a huge party and helping spread Covid-19:
JFK wrote a book called “Profiles in Courage” about politicians who had taken unpopular stances in Congress for the good of the people. It won the Pulitzer Prize. The book would be much easier to write these days – a cover and hundreds of blank pages.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Note to fundamentalists – Christian, Islamic, and Jewish: kindness does not equal weakness, compassion does not equal wickedness. Being female does not make you evil. Satan was not a liberal. Education gives hope. If you want to be a fundamentalist become Buddhist. Jesus plagerized their teachings and he was a smart guy.
The Viet Cong cadres had a phrase “Hy Sinh” often repeated in their nightly indoctrination speeches to peasant villagers. It meant something on the order of personal sacrifice. Then, those cadres would do whatever it took no matter how cruel or barbarous, even to themselves, to unify their country. Our politicians have the idea half right. They talk sincerely about “personal sacrifice” – someone, anyone, else’s.
Confucious was the first philosopher the first to utter the Golden Rule, but he wasn’t the only one. I believe Jesus mentioned it as a cornerstone of Christianity, which seems to be a totally different religion than the one practiced by a lot of evangelical, racist, homophobic freaks here in America.
Stevie Ray Vaughn complimented Elmore James by doing a blistering cover of “The Sky Is Crying” in the 1980’s. But, the original is pretty fantastic.
As I taught in classes for years, the 1st Amendment applies to government interference with your free speech. It does NOT apply if you are a whiny, stupid, right-wing talk show host who’s been given a medium through which you can mislead millions and some of those millions take note that you are a phony. Someday even the dumb asses will figure this out.
Why is it that assholes who never went to Vietnam always think we were doing the Vietnamese people a favor by being there?
It’s cocktail hour somewhere. I’ve got half a jar of olives, enough gin for a few martinis, enough existential dread to put on my Delaney and Bonnie CD and I’m on a mission from god…RIP John Belushi
My children and I have often contemplated the source of our existential dread and, in particular, my often edgy and insane behavior. Now, thanks to Steven Pressfield, the answer is clear. “Nothing relieves Irish depair. The Irishman’s complaint lies not with his circumstance, which might be rendered brilliant by labor or luck, but with the injustice of existence itself. Irish despair knows no remedy. Money doesn’t help. Love fades. Fame is fleeting. The only cures are booze and sentiment. That’s why the Irish are such noble drunks and glorious poets…They’re angels imprisoned in vessels of flesh.” Thank you, Mr. Pressfield. I shall now make a martini.
I asked my English 101 students to list five core beliefs that guided their lives and then write an essay about how and why. I’m grading my first paper and this student’s # 1 core belief is – “Bros before Hoes” – and now everyone knows why I drink. BTW, isn’t a “hoe” some kind of gardening tool and a “ho” someone from a cheesey MTV video.
Here’s what goes really well with old age – Gin.
If a person decides to devote his or her life to putting out fires or trying to teach children to read and write instead of making a personal bank account grow beyond imagination, or need, this doesn’t mean that person is an enemy of America. America should be about more than greed. “The profit motive, when it is the sole basis for an economic system, encourages a cut throat competition and selfish ambition that inspires men to be more concerned about making a living than making a life.” – Martin Luther King I guess this is why old cross-dressing J. Edgar Hoover thought King was a commie because compassion also starts with a C.
Remember when teachers, public employees, Planned Parenthood, NPR and PBS crashed the stock market, wiped out half of our 401Ks, took trillions in TARP money, spilled oil in the Gulf of Mexico, gave themselves billions in bonuses, and paid no taxes? Yeah, me neither.
STD’s are now supposed to be referred to as STI’s – sexually transmitted infections – so those people who caught the clap from a hooker in Bangkok won’t have their self esteem lowered by virtue of being diseased. Does this mean Republican congressmen are now to be referred to as infections?
For those of you who went to Chik-Fil-A today to show your support for a billionaire homophobic piece of shit, I heard the mayo came directly from Rick Santorum. Enjoy…
What I can’t buy legally – Clairitin D. What I can buy legally – Assault Rifle, 100 round magazine, 6000 rounds of ammunition, 7.62 mm, full metal jacket. NRA treatment for sinus infection – bullet in the brain pan…
Jim McGarrah, Author 